W is for Waterfall... a ribbon of white.
W is for Whitewater, a beautiful sight.
(Asthmagirl is in the white shirt with the blue hat)
ABC Wednesday is from the fertile imagination of Mrs. Nesbitt. Stop by and visit to find links to other entries.
Over the last few weeks, possibly months, I've been considering some changes in my life. While I'm not wretchedly unhappy, I have noted that there seems to be a gap between what I'm currently spending time doing and what I'd like to be spending time doing. Or... maybe there's just an overabundance of what I'm currently doing and I can't see anything else!
For those that aren't in the know... I work full time as a grant writer/IT person for a disability agency. When the opportunity presented itself, I also started my own business doing the exact same thing for a separate entity. Mostly, this was a way to fill my dance card when TOG began working evenings. It certainly keeps me occupied. I've been living this crazy plan for over 4 years and I've been fine until lately.
I'm just beginning to realize that as long as I continue to do this, I'm limiting my ability to do anything else... take a photography class, improve my IT skills, explore additional writing opportunities, the list goes on. So yesterday, I let my client know that I will no longer be doing free lance grant writing. I will continue to do IT work... mostly because I know his systems inside out and I think he'd have a hard time finding someone that would take him on. He's kind of difficult.
I have not yet figured out how to absorb the financial blip. I suspect it will be a month or two before he finishes paying my invoices for work in progress, so I'll have some time to figure it out. The money from my business mostly goes into savings. Occasionally I take a chunk out and buy TOG a computer or take him to Canada. It's also my shoe money and hair money! And in a way, it's independence because I don't have to account to anyone for it. TOG and I consider this the "don't ask/don't tell" portion of our finances! But it will affect my ability to save and I'll likely reduce some expenditures (not hair)!
Mostly, I'm looking forward to taking a deep breath and asking myself what do I want to do? I'll have time now to think about it. What would you do if you got an additional block of time? Inquiring minds want to know!
It may come as no surprise that as opposed to working together, sometimes I and my lungs (Or asthma as TOG reminds me) enjoy a somewhat adversarial relationship.The phenomenon rears it's head on occasions when I want to do something that the lungs are not on board with. This is usually acerbated by TOG, who subscribes to the theory that I can do whatever I want as long as "we take it easy". Mostly he's right but there are times when it just seems that no amount of accommodation can get the lungs to join the team. This was the case yesterday.
On Saturday, we hiked 10 miles with minimal elevation gain, but with a bit of weight on our backs. Yesterday, we hiked only 4 miles with minimal weight (hydration packs) and significant elevation gain. We were gaining about 800-1000 feet per mile. The hiking guide rates the trail a five out of five difficulty. Yes, I can hear you now... "But Asthmagirl, why did you attempt a trail that difficult"? Because I hate limitations. Because I want to believe that TOG is right. Because since getting asthma, I've had a difficult time figuring out how to view myself. It's like this.... as a hiker, I blow. Easy to admit. But as an asthmatic, I rock! I'm very lucky that I can do so much. As an asthmatic hiker...? Where are my limitations? Where do I draw the line? At what point am I achieving a goal and when am I just beating the crap out of my lungs? The line seems very flexible and because of that flexibility, I'm always surprised when I hit the wall.
Since this is only the third time I've hit the wall, and I hit it on a 5 star (in difficulty) trail, I should probably be okay with it. However that attitude was little comfort yesterday when I was dragging my sagging lungs up the side of the mountain, and even less today when I checked my peak flow and find they're still crabby and whiny! Part of me wants to say "I'll go back and kick this trail's butt" however I think it's more realistic to say I probably have better opportunities out there that won't put the lungs and I at such odds with each other!
In any case, I was able to get some great shots every time I collapsed stopped to catch my breath.
Many of these staircases that seemed to keep going!
Thick woods throughout!
TOG was going nuts while I took this shot!
Hope y'all had a delightful weekend! Enjoy your day!
Because the Alpine area is still socked in with snow, TOG and I elected to hike in the low country yesterday. I wanted to break my new pack in and the trail we picked had a very mild grade, so I wouldn't be trying to gain a lot of elevation on my first time with a lot of weight. I'm accustomed to carrying my Camelback in the summer, but it doesn't weigh more than a few pounds. It also doesn't hold more than an inhaler and a dog biscuit either! So I threw my tripod and camera and some food and and my camel back and hat in there and off we went (I'm betting it weighed at least 20 pounds).
Unfortunately, we got some bad information about what we were looking for and could not find it... so we kept hiking... and hiking... and hiking. By the time we saw the next trail information, we were 5 miles out... which means a 10 mile round trip, with packs... because TOG tried carrying our new tent to test the weight. We took turns on the way out carrying Maddie every now and then because 10 miles may be her limit anyway, but for her first hike of the season, it was a bit much for her. So we gave her a lift every now and then!
All of this is the long way of saying that I'm exhausted and my back hurts. TOG wants to hike again today but he's still sleeping so I don't know how he'll feel when he wakes up.
I downloaded some shots, and here's a few of them I resized...
TOG and Maddie on the way up. It was about 78 degrees and muggy. In spite of the weather, the lungs did pretty well. Low altitude and no major climb made it a good lung day in spite of the "muggy" factor!
There was this wall of rock with water dripping down, and at the base, this huge grouping of maiden hair ferns!
Maddie, getting a lift on the way out. She weighs around 7 pounds, so in a way, it kind of counterbalanced the weight on the back. But because TOG and I had carried so much so far that day... even toting Maddie for a while wears you out faster!
When we got close to the trail head, we met a guy walking his two dogs. He reached out to pet Maddie in my arms and one of his dogs bit me in the leg. No break in the skin, just a little pinch bruise. The guy was great about it, but it was a lousy ending to a great day!
Asthmagirl out!
Yesterday was incredibly stressful... the server was down when I got to work in the morning. I had people standing in the hallway sipping coffee when I got there... "Hey. Server's down". So I'm moving briskly toward the modem and router closet and as I stand on the stool to check the signal, people are staring in the closet asking "is it fixed yet?" I try to be patient as I know how big an issue it is for people to be "down". So I give the standard "No, but I'm working on it". Determining the signal is fine, I climb down, grab the keys for the server closet room, and head down to see what's wrong. I just get the door open and start to log into the server when I get two people walking up to me asking "So what's wrong with the server? How long will it take to fix? I have an email that I have to send this morning." Deep breath...I'm just trying to figure out what's wrong folks and until I do, I don't know how long it will take to fix.
We were down for about an hour and by the end of the day, I think it was barely a blip on the screen, but in that time span of "the technology on my desk is useless without a signal" it really sends folks into a tail spin. It only happens a couple times a year, so I tend to forget how tense folks can get... including me!
Thus I was really looking forward to relaxing at the pub with TOG. We didn't stay too long last night and oddly, no one around us was eating so I only got shots of TOG's and my food.
My half order of nachos. The chili last night was chipotle barbecue chicken. YUM! My absolute favorite chili they make!
TOG's Chop Chop salad!
Fresh field greens tossed with herbed balsamic vinaigrette, kidney beans,Parmesan cheese, olives, Roma tomatoes, feta cheese and "Dan the Sausage Man's" summer sausage.
Served with warm pita bread.
It's his favorite salad!
What did you have for dinner last night?
That should do nicely!
Because I was thrown so far off course with K2's tonsil the last couple days, I'm abandoning my blog plan for the day and just letting this one flow.
So last you heard, we were getting cleaned up and heading for the doctor yesterday afternoon. No... I posted a comment to say I'd seen the tonsil. Girlfriend could open her mouth far enough. OMG! It was huge. It was no longer pushing her uvula over, but it was all out in the middle of her throat. Her face was swollen, even her ear and neck hurt. This next bit is going to have some detail so skip down if you don't want to read it. There's no way to say this stuff delicately.
*graphic paragraph*Tuesday, the tonsil had been completely coated in white pus. Wednesday morning it had a localized circle of white. The steroids had helped to shrink the tonsil and apparently the infection as well. We were dressed and getting ready to leave when Girlfriend grabbed her little kidney shaped dish from the hospital and started.... emitting. Stuff. Lots of it. And the smell! Horrendous. OMG. Her tonsil abscess ruptured before we could even leave the house. I've never seen anything like it. She checked on the way to the doctor's and the white circle was gone. Thus the doctor declared that it was not an abscess, just tonsillitis. We tried to explain what had happened, but I think we came off as a little dramatic and overly concerned (you really had to be there to see what had come out). However he did note that he would be willing to remove her tonsils later this year after everything had cleared up.
The lungs appear to be back on track after missing the one dose Tuesday night. I'm a little surprised that they even reacted because they're usually so stable in the summer. But even last week when I tried reducing the inhaled steroids, they were complete toads so I guess I'll be nurturing them for a while yet. I was just really surprised to blow a yellow zone peak flow yesterday morning. I did it three times to be sure. So I used my stronger inhaler yesterday and this morning I'm back at the top of my green zone. Where is my stability? These things used to be like a rock in the summer. Now they're like a rock sinking to the bottom of a pond! Stupid lungs.
And the leg. It is the best it's been in months. Seriously. I didn't want to rush to that conclusion, but I've completed the antibiotics and it's doing well. I no longer walk like a cast member of Deadliest Catch! So I tested it Monday and took it for a bike ride. A quick three miles at 12 miles per hour. No, I'm not a big dummy. I just figure if it's going to act up, lets do it now while the surgeon is waiting to hear. Because if the leg is going to behave, I'm going to start working it... bike rides, hiking, and I plan to start running. If it can't hold up to that level of activity, now is the time to address it, not mid July when I plan to be using it a lot more (assuming the lungs are along for the ride!). The last thing I want to have happen is to plan a big alpine hike with TOG and have the leg wimp out.
Finally, I want to take a moment to thank someone for helping me out. When I called her on the way to the hospital, she totally had my back. Got on-line, found the map to the hospital, helped me make some decisions about keeping other family in the loop and made me laugh! K1 can really be a rock. And she probably doesn't get the recognition she deserves for being level headed. Truly, she ought to be bronzed. Except that might hurt!
Hopefully back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow. (such as it is) And I'm really going to try to get food porn this week! Have a wonderful day!
Asthmagirl out!
We interrupt our regularly scheduled programing .... well, because we can. We're Editor-in-chief! I pretty much had the remaining posts this week planned, but I love the spontaneity of throwing the plans in the air and going with what's happening. First of all, the disclaimers:
And now for the back story. K2 is possibly the daughter most like me (poor dear). She got my long, skinny stork legs, stubborn nature and delicate stomach... some of which will come into play later!! She also appears to be sporting her own chronic condition which in her case, would be a funky throat. I can't tell you how many infections, swollen glands and strep she's had over the last 5-6 years. So much so that we've become a bit jaded. Much like my lungs acting up, we view a flare up of her throat as just another wrinkle in the fabric of the universe. The unfortunate aspect to all these infections is that according to the medical community, she's never had enough infections or enough in a one year period to justify removing her funky tonsils. Apparently the rule of thumb is four in one year. In her senior year, she had four cases of strep in 14 months which was just outside the standard. Seriously.
As you might imagine by now, the little dear began another funky throat a few weeks ago. She waited to see if it would clear up (finals week in nursing school so she didn't have time to go in!) and then the day after finals she went to the doctor. She failed the rapid strep so they weren't sure what kind of infection it was but because of her history they put her on antibiotics anyway. She asked for the liquid amoxicillin because her throat was so sore. So she keeps getting worse and Monday night TOG and I were both telling her to shag her butt back to the doctor because seriously, she could barely open her mouth.
Yesterday afternoon, she texts me from the doctor with this message: "They're sending me to the ER because my tonsil is abscessed and I need IV antibiotics and they're going to drain it" This is where my cape begins fluttering big time. I had one tiny moment in which I wondered if she would need me (she's 22) and then I didn't care. I needed to be there for her. So off I went to tell my boss I was missing our afternoon meeting and then screech my tires as I left the parking lot!
There was the usual requisite waiting in ER, even on a Tuesday afternoon. K2 and I did two things to pass the time...
Finally, after she diagnosed everyone in the waiting room, they get us back in a treatment room, and lucky us, we get the best ER doctor I've ever met. He asks questions and I recite what's she's told me to say via hand signals, lip reading, a lifted eyebrow and other means on non verbal communication.
After four shots of morphine, a huge dose of antibiotics, a mega dose of IV steroids and a follow up shot of anti nausea (girlfriend's delicate stomach cannot handle morphine well), the excellent doctor determined that he cannot open her mouth far enough to drain anything. The infection encompasses a very large area. He hopes the steroids will bring down the inflammation enough that she can open her mouth so they can drain it in the morning. They gave her enough morphine to last her until midnight and then sent her home with all the appropriate drugs. We're going back this morning to get it drained. We slept downstairs on the sofa which was not that restful as the only thing she can eat to take her meds is runny cream of wheat. I made the last batch at 4:45 am and she's sleeping again.
The ear, nose and throat dude opens up shop in an hour, so I'm going to go clean up and take my meds which I forgot last night (hence the grumpy lungs). I'm toying with trying to take a shot of her tonsil just for fun. I am a sick, sick woman.
Asthmagirl out!
I put off my father's day blog because I needed a little extra time to sort out how I wanted to record this. I've had the privilege of reading a variety of posts that dealt with recognizing many wonderful fathers and husbands. Here is my contribution:
If we described my mom as distant, uninterested and detached, we could easily describe my dad as committed and distracted. Hampered by the FAA's constant demands for shift work that would have made a saint weep for sleep, my father spent at least half of his off time recovering from sleep deprivation. When my father was available, he could, with one glance sort the slackers from the achievers and deal with them accordingly. He was steadfast, predictable and unconcerned with the softer emotions. His moral compass was guided by logic, outcomes and the desire to raise unspoiled kids.
When my mother determined to go to college, it was my dad that stepped up to the plate and taught me to cook. He made a mess of braiding my hair, and made my ability to understand math his life's purpose for the entire fifth grade. Unhampered by little niceties like compassion and patience, he pushed his standards with an unwavering insistence. He taught me to read schematics, fix a car, cook a steak, understand football and enjoy fishing. During high school, one of my aptitude tests indicated that I should be an jet engine mechanic. This was based on my tool recognition and my understanding of engine systems.
He was the exact opposite of my mother, in many ways. When they separated and divorced, it was my dad that remained in contact with me... My dad that helped me plan my wedding to TOG (which my mother crashed)... My dad that became the stable influence for my kids. My dad that watched K1 and K2 while I was in the hospital delivering K3.
I called him on Father's day when he got back in town, and we had a pretty good conversation. I did not laugh when he said he was turning into a crotchety old bastard. Some people might have leaped on that and affirmed it... I just let it go. But when he told me I was like my mother... things heated up a little! Last night, he called me back to say he misspoke... that I was stubborn like my mother and that's where the resemblance ended. He shared a story my mom shared with him after their divorce and how one gentleman she's been dating for a few months asked her to marry him. He had a daughter and my mom told my dad she turned him down... because she didn't want to be anyone's mother. It made my dad sad to hear it, but he said it reaffirmed to him that he still wanted to be an involved parent, even with adult kids.
I'm fortunate to have had my dad all these years. He's not a saint, not perfect, sometimes not even tolerable. He has rusty social graces, salty language, pants that can't stay up (no butt) and defines the word "opinionated". But he's also dedicated, honest, forthright and nowadays... loving. The one charactoristic my dad had that set him apart was "intent". He wanted to parent well and so he did, using the skills that he had. He gave me some great skills and experiences and taught me some very meaningful things. I'm really, really lucky to have him for a dad.
Happy (belated) Father's Day!
Asthmagirl out!
The really great weather that Seattle's been missing showed up just in time for Father's day! I offered to take TOG on a hike which would have been much better weather than the Mother's Day hike we went on, but he turned me down. Later in the day he was saying "what a mistake"!
So we took the doglets down to the beach. The tide was way out and they had a great time except for Maddie who doesn't do water!
I also wanted to include a shot of the progress on the side of the house. Sometimes I think we're stalling because the back is going to be such a huge job! But we really do want to finish this... so hopefully this week! All that's left is the path... and it's a huge improvement from where we started!
We did stop by the pub yesterday for a Father's Day pint. I couldn't help myself and had a cup of the Basil Pesto Chicken Chile. It definitely had some bite! Finally, we ended the day with a cookout with the girls in which my infamous potato salad made an appearance! TOG said he had a wonderful day!
In other news, I'm still researching alarms and haven't decided yet. I appreciate the feedback I've received... Now I just need to finish the research and get it done.
Have a great day!
Asthmagirl out!
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